It's funny. In a world with endless tragedy, sad stories, and disasters that fill the news pages, i still manage to get up every day and lead a pretty great life. Movie stars are crazy, singers are lazy, and no one is a good role model when the video tapes come out. And yet, despite the fact that The Bachelorette never finds lasting love, I sleep well at night, laugh a lot, and have so much to be thankful for that i often lose track of my blessings.
I'm not rich, I'm not famous, and no one really cares what happens to me outside of my family and friends. I drive a mini-van, I do my own grocery shopping, and I spend most of my vacations within the continental United States. I change diapers, scrub toilets, and i jump on the trampoline for fun. I am solely responsible for cooking and feeding four people EVERY day. And because of (not despite) all this, I consider myself one of the luckiest people on the face of the earth.
How? some people may ask. For the last nine years i have been blessed to call myself a mom. Now, that doesn't get a lot of attention, unless of course, i'm a recovering meth addict who's now a great mom, or a movie star/model who manages to "do it all" in addition to a fabulous career. No, the regular moms who drive car pool, make tuna casseroles, and spend so much time doing laundry that we decorate the laundry rooms a la Southern Living, don't elicit a lot of fanfare. But those people who think that the face of a real mom is found on the covers of People and Redbook, have no idea that regular, average, run-of-the-mill moms pretty much have the world on a string.
When you are a mom, lonely is a word that doesn't even register in your vocabulary. Can i get a witness? Bathroom, shower, telephone conversations, grocery shopping with balloons attached to my cart for the sake of a little sanity--all are conducted with my entourage in tow. Dinners out (even at chick-fil-a) with a baby on the lap and a utensil in one hand have become the norm for how to eat and cook. And who can forget bedtime? I know i'm not the only one who more than once a week winds up with an extra person in the bed. Yeah, and if I don't return your phone calls, you already know why. And if you don't call me, well, let's just say my feelings aren't hurt and i'll look forward to your phone calls when Tate starts kindergarten. Like i said, i can't even imagine being lonely; and i really don't want to.
I am never at a loss for quotable material,either. In fact if i were smart i'd walk around carrying a mini tape recorder so i wouldn't miss a thing. Just yesterday, Tanner came in to tell me that he'd never be able to take a shower or bath again (serious face). He'd suffered some sort of cut or bug bite that kept him from immersing his foot in water, so cleansing via water was out of the question, forever it seems. And in another very serious conversation, Tucker was asking if people from Mississippi are called Mississippians. "Well, what are Mexicans called?" Tanner now wants to know. And they think they can't make me laugh!
Honesty. I've already written about the brutal honesty that comes from tucker's mouth, but really it never gets old. At Silver Sneakers the other day, i was putting out one of our exertion charts and talking to one of my members at the same time. Tucker came in and asked what I was doing with it. I told him it was kind of a list of rules, and right there, in front of my over 55 member says, "oh yeah, old people like to follow rules." Swear to it y'all.
I can't mention honesty without throwing in a little bit of lying with it. When your kids tell you they want a WII not for themselves, but because they have yoga and other aerobics things for me, i have to laugh. Similarly, when they spot a gorgeous celebrity on the cover of one of those very magazines i scoff at and tell me "she" looks just like me, i marvel at their attempt.
I guess what it boils down to is that i've just seen one too many shots of Britney and her kids, and all the other stars who really put shame to the term of mom that i can't stand it anymore. Real moms ROCK, and deserve the credit that gets heaped too many times on the lame excuses who don't know what it's like to sit up at night with a sick baby or watch the same Barney video so many times you hum the songs while out for a jog. Seriously, i know i'm not the only one who has looked around the room to discover that she's watching Phineas and Ferb and the children are nowhere to be found.
So kudos to all the real moms who work, cook, chauffeur, clean, and still manage to read books, run races, have dates with their husbands, and vacation at the beach without having their every move documented for America's enjoyment. Even bigger kudos to those same moms who actually realize how lucky they are and are enjoying every loud, sticky, sleep-deprived moment.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
The Wonder Years
I know it was a bittersweet weekend for Mississippi, a big win for one team, a big loss for another. I may have been gone for 9 years and I may live almost 500 miles from home, but my roots run deep. I swear the only reason i pay such a ridiculous price for TV is so that if MS State or Ole Miss is playing footbal, basketball, baseball, or water polo, i can catch the game; and I'm never so proud as when i wear my Ole Miss or Ms State t-shirt (yes, i have both)in a sea of Bulldog red.
I'm proud of my home state, yes, and it has more to do with just football,(though i do think it is a grand sport:) I get all giddy when i check out a magazine and see some aspect of the Magnolia state highlighted. Just today I had some free time to read my Southern Living out on the back deck and was thrilled to see that as they were highlighting the Best of the South, Mississippi and its famous Mississippians stole the show for the amazing music. Specifically, it is the music of the Delta, the legendary Blues singers who honed their talent from the way of life that is so typical of the flat farm land that stretches along Highway 61.
Awww, all of a sudden I'm a little homesick. I lived in the Delta, very briefly, and drove that highway so many times i knew every bend and bump in the road. Sadly, I remember, too, that I couldn't wait to leave the Delta, head down 61 one last time and never go back. Did i not know then what I know now? Were there no articles on the music, the history, the family relationships that prevail in small towns along the river?
I was too young to appreciate the culture shock of a town that doesn't change much, where the high schools are staffed mostly with teachers who are former students, or neighborhoods whose streets sound off like alphabetical listings in a phone book. Nope, I couldn't see it, and as soon as life opened another door we packed our things and floored that U-Haul down that same highway one last time.
Well, as it often does, life has a funny way of turning things around on you, and seven years later we found ourselves in a another new town, eerily similar to the one we fled so many years ago: high school students checking us out at the grocery store, churches filled with great-grandparents and their kids, grandkids, and finally their great grandkids, one redlight only on the way to school, the closest mall 30 minutes away. Yes, I'd been here before, but this time . . . surprise of all surprises, I LOVE it! I am smarter now(older, too), aware that it is the little things in life that make a city a home, and not just some place you live until the next door opens and the moving van shows up.
And for a coach and his family, new doors open up all the time. Plenty of doors have opened (and closed) for us, and realistically many more will in the future. So even though i regret the impulsive me who didn't appreciate what i was leaving behind in the Delta, I can now say that wherever we go, whatever each new town holds (or doesn't), I cherish each person, each road I run, each little quirk it holds, because you never know, the town you once ran from just might turn into the place you're running to.
I'm proud of my home state, yes, and it has more to do with just football,(though i do think it is a grand sport:) I get all giddy when i check out a magazine and see some aspect of the Magnolia state highlighted. Just today I had some free time to read my Southern Living out on the back deck and was thrilled to see that as they were highlighting the Best of the South, Mississippi and its famous Mississippians stole the show for the amazing music. Specifically, it is the music of the Delta, the legendary Blues singers who honed their talent from the way of life that is so typical of the flat farm land that stretches along Highway 61.
Awww, all of a sudden I'm a little homesick. I lived in the Delta, very briefly, and drove that highway so many times i knew every bend and bump in the road. Sadly, I remember, too, that I couldn't wait to leave the Delta, head down 61 one last time and never go back. Did i not know then what I know now? Were there no articles on the music, the history, the family relationships that prevail in small towns along the river?
I was too young to appreciate the culture shock of a town that doesn't change much, where the high schools are staffed mostly with teachers who are former students, or neighborhoods whose streets sound off like alphabetical listings in a phone book. Nope, I couldn't see it, and as soon as life opened another door we packed our things and floored that U-Haul down that same highway one last time.
Well, as it often does, life has a funny way of turning things around on you, and seven years later we found ourselves in a another new town, eerily similar to the one we fled so many years ago: high school students checking us out at the grocery store, churches filled with great-grandparents and their kids, grandkids, and finally their great grandkids, one redlight only on the way to school, the closest mall 30 minutes away. Yes, I'd been here before, but this time . . . surprise of all surprises, I LOVE it! I am smarter now(older, too), aware that it is the little things in life that make a city a home, and not just some place you live until the next door opens and the moving van shows up.
And for a coach and his family, new doors open up all the time. Plenty of doors have opened (and closed) for us, and realistically many more will in the future. So even though i regret the impulsive me who didn't appreciate what i was leaving behind in the Delta, I can now say that wherever we go, whatever each new town holds (or doesn't), I cherish each person, each road I run, each little quirk it holds, because you never know, the town you once ran from just might turn into the place you're running to.
Friday, July 9, 2010
I know this is hard to believe (or maybe just hard to stomach, again:)), but I love football. And it's not just the game and the season and all the hoopla that surrounds a Friday night, but I love the whole lifestyle that comes with being a coaching family. I'm sure I've complained numerous times about how late Billy works at night and the incessant phone calls about lawn mowers, team physicals, and weight room shenanigans, especially when i was a young wife just learning the ropes; but after many years of living this way, I have alot to brag about. And tonight, i think i'd like to share:)
First of all, can we say T-SHIRTS!!!! I am a walking advertisement for everything from orthopaedic foot care to the new Gatorade flavor to the best sporting goods stores around. I am never at a loss for a shirt to run in, do housework in, or parade around Kroger in on a lazy Saturday afternoon.
Next, there are now online sites that allow moms to find babysitters who are qualified, responsible, and available at a moment's notice. I've never needed a site such as that. Let's just say that cheerleaders line up to keep an adorable infant (as do some of my favorite Panther moms) and when the big boys get too big for girl babysitters, the best thing is a babysitter who can throw a spiral in the backyard and come inside and play Madden till it's lights out. And that whole responsible thing? Word travels fast around high school halls, so any undesirable candidate has been eliminated before she even applies. SOmetimes gossip IS okay.
It gets better. During the season, I very often open the fridge on Saturday mornings and find leftovers from Friday's pregame meal. Now, if that isn't a pleasant surprise for a weary mom on a busy weekend, I don't know what is. Tucker and Tanner don't even care what it is, as long as Daddy brought it home and they know that the players ate it, it's a keeper. Which means whether i want to eat it or not, supper is already cooked and i can sit back and watch the Georgia game (somewhat) uninterrupted.
There are plenty more reasons to love this life: tickets to the Georgia games, endless samples of deodorant, prewrap, and shaving cream, and old jerseys that become costumes whenever necessary. An open track to run on with nobody to tell me i can't bring my jogstroller. And then there are those little moments when God reminds us that he's never far from the action. My friend likes to say that when we want something, sometimes we have to just be patient and wait for God to "show out." Well, today, he not only showed out, he did cartwheels and back handsprings.
In just a couple of weeks, Billy will be taking his team to FCA camp at West Georgia College. Though it is a team activity, the players must pay for their own trips. Reality check: the economy stinks and some kids (and families) just don't have the money. So Billy has been stewing over this for weeks. How to get all of his players to a camp that no one should have to miss out on. He prayed, e- mailed, and made numerous phone calls. Little bits came in here and there, but still we had several players who still needed scholarships. As we were heading to Lake Lanier Islands with the boys today, the "showing out" began. Billy got a call from a guy who wanted to help him with the scholarships and miraculously was able to offer the money that Billy would need to insure that EVERY player would attend what has been rumored to be a "life-changing" camp. We couldn't believe it. Billy had called this guy hoping he would be able to help with 2 maybe 3 players and instead will provide for 13!!!!!
All together, Billy has had people step up and offer enough money to allow 27 boys to attend camp, boys who otherwise would be staying home.
We drove in AWE the rest of the way and enjoyed our afternoon in the sun, reminded again that miracles do happen. Just can't wait to see what the next miracle is that God has in store for our PANTHERS!
First of all, can we say T-SHIRTS!!!! I am a walking advertisement for everything from orthopaedic foot care to the new Gatorade flavor to the best sporting goods stores around. I am never at a loss for a shirt to run in, do housework in, or parade around Kroger in on a lazy Saturday afternoon.
Next, there are now online sites that allow moms to find babysitters who are qualified, responsible, and available at a moment's notice. I've never needed a site such as that. Let's just say that cheerleaders line up to keep an adorable infant (as do some of my favorite Panther moms) and when the big boys get too big for girl babysitters, the best thing is a babysitter who can throw a spiral in the backyard and come inside and play Madden till it's lights out. And that whole responsible thing? Word travels fast around high school halls, so any undesirable candidate has been eliminated before she even applies. SOmetimes gossip IS okay.
It gets better. During the season, I very often open the fridge on Saturday mornings and find leftovers from Friday's pregame meal. Now, if that isn't a pleasant surprise for a weary mom on a busy weekend, I don't know what is. Tucker and Tanner don't even care what it is, as long as Daddy brought it home and they know that the players ate it, it's a keeper. Which means whether i want to eat it or not, supper is already cooked and i can sit back and watch the Georgia game (somewhat) uninterrupted.
There are plenty more reasons to love this life: tickets to the Georgia games, endless samples of deodorant, prewrap, and shaving cream, and old jerseys that become costumes whenever necessary. An open track to run on with nobody to tell me i can't bring my jogstroller. And then there are those little moments when God reminds us that he's never far from the action. My friend likes to say that when we want something, sometimes we have to just be patient and wait for God to "show out." Well, today, he not only showed out, he did cartwheels and back handsprings.
In just a couple of weeks, Billy will be taking his team to FCA camp at West Georgia College. Though it is a team activity, the players must pay for their own trips. Reality check: the economy stinks and some kids (and families) just don't have the money. So Billy has been stewing over this for weeks. How to get all of his players to a camp that no one should have to miss out on. He prayed, e- mailed, and made numerous phone calls. Little bits came in here and there, but still we had several players who still needed scholarships. As we were heading to Lake Lanier Islands with the boys today, the "showing out" began. Billy got a call from a guy who wanted to help him with the scholarships and miraculously was able to offer the money that Billy would need to insure that EVERY player would attend what has been rumored to be a "life-changing" camp. We couldn't believe it. Billy had called this guy hoping he would be able to help with 2 maybe 3 players and instead will provide for 13!!!!!
All together, Billy has had people step up and offer enough money to allow 27 boys to attend camp, boys who otherwise would be staying home.
We drove in AWE the rest of the way and enjoyed our afternoon in the sun, reminded again that miracles do happen. Just can't wait to see what the next miracle is that God has in store for our PANTHERS!
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Things you should NEVER tell your mother!
As a mother of three boys, the word "no" comes up quite a bit at my house, in my car, and at every venue in Jackson county.
"No, you can't do your homework after practice."
"No, you can't take Tate down the street without me."
"No, you can't stay up to watch the new episode of Zack and Cody."
You get the picture. Unfortunately, it's not only i who frequently throws out the N-bomb; no, Tate has figured out that little word and though he can't say it yet, he KNOWS what it means and usually tries to ignore it whenever i use it.
"No Tate, stay away from the catfood."
"No Tate, hands don't go in the potty."
"No Tate, don't touch Daddy's phone, computer, remote, . . ."
And yet he does them all anyway, smiling the whole time.
And then there's the other two loves of my life, Tucker and Tanner. They give me as many no's as i give them.
"Have you brushed your teeth?" NO
"Are your shoes tied?" NO
"Are you wearing shoes?" No
"did you bring home your study sheet?"
So between me, Daddy, Tucker, Tanner, and Tate, No is one word we don't need any help with. Unfortunately, there are others, little retorts that sometimes make me shudder when i hear them. Phrases and responses that have mysteriously (thanks, Disney Channel) popped into my young boys' mouths. I try to warn them at first, hoping that after one stern look and threat of dismemberment, they won't ever use them again. My looks must not be so bad, because they keep popping up. So here goes: Top Ten things you should never say to your mother. Pass them along. Post them on your fridge. Warn the youngsters of today that had WE ever uttered these quirky remarks to our mothers and fathers, we would have been picking our switches from a backyard bush so fast our heads would have already spun.
10. (as we are getting into the car), Do we need shoes?
9. (as we are getting into bed for the night), "OOh, i need a posterboard!"
when? "tomorrow!"
8. (At the dinner table), I don't eat this.......... oh, really????
7. (when asking if a friend can come along), But his mom already said yes!
6. (after i do a smell check after bath or shower), you didn't say to use soap!
5. Y'all never let us . . . (when asking permission for something they
KNOW we'll never agree to.)
4. Mom, you are the coolest, best mom in the whole world (when asking permission for something they KNOW we'll never agree to.)
3. Mom, stop that; you're embarrassing me!!!! (When i'm walking through school saying hello to their friends, or when i'm dancing in the car to Cupid Shuffle.)
2. Mom, why do your arms shake like that? (while he points to my dangling tricep) Boo Tanner!
And finally, the one response these days that can turn an otherwise happy-go-lucky Mom (who had her run for the day) into a hot-tempered, finger-pointing, punishment-issuing drill sergeant:
1. Hold on!!! (when i ask you to take out the trash, bring me your homework, play with your brother, or stand on your head and spin, I mean now!!!!) I am too old to "hold on" and you are too young to even exercise that phrase.
Well, I feel better:)
"No, you can't do your homework after practice."
"No, you can't take Tate down the street without me."
"No, you can't stay up to watch the new episode of Zack and Cody."
You get the picture. Unfortunately, it's not only i who frequently throws out the N-bomb; no, Tate has figured out that little word and though he can't say it yet, he KNOWS what it means and usually tries to ignore it whenever i use it.
"No Tate, stay away from the catfood."
"No Tate, hands don't go in the potty."
"No Tate, don't touch Daddy's phone, computer, remote, . . ."
And yet he does them all anyway, smiling the whole time.
And then there's the other two loves of my life, Tucker and Tanner. They give me as many no's as i give them.
"Have you brushed your teeth?" NO
"Are your shoes tied?" NO
"Are you wearing shoes?" No
"did you bring home your study sheet?"
So between me, Daddy, Tucker, Tanner, and Tate, No is one word we don't need any help with. Unfortunately, there are others, little retorts that sometimes make me shudder when i hear them. Phrases and responses that have mysteriously (thanks, Disney Channel) popped into my young boys' mouths. I try to warn them at first, hoping that after one stern look and threat of dismemberment, they won't ever use them again. My looks must not be so bad, because they keep popping up. So here goes: Top Ten things you should never say to your mother. Pass them along. Post them on your fridge. Warn the youngsters of today that had WE ever uttered these quirky remarks to our mothers and fathers, we would have been picking our switches from a backyard bush so fast our heads would have already spun.
10. (as we are getting into the car), Do we need shoes?
9. (as we are getting into bed for the night), "OOh, i need a posterboard!"
when? "tomorrow!"
8. (At the dinner table), I don't eat this.......... oh, really????
7. (when asking if a friend can come along), But his mom already said yes!
6. (after i do a smell check after bath or shower), you didn't say to use soap!
5. Y'all never let us . . . (when asking permission for something they
KNOW we'll never agree to.)
4. Mom, you are the coolest, best mom in the whole world (when asking permission for something they KNOW we'll never agree to.)
3. Mom, stop that; you're embarrassing me!!!! (When i'm walking through school saying hello to their friends, or when i'm dancing in the car to Cupid Shuffle.)
2. Mom, why do your arms shake like that? (while he points to my dangling tricep) Boo Tanner!
And finally, the one response these days that can turn an otherwise happy-go-lucky Mom (who had her run for the day) into a hot-tempered, finger-pointing, punishment-issuing drill sergeant:
1. Hold on!!! (when i ask you to take out the trash, bring me your homework, play with your brother, or stand on your head and spin, I mean now!!!!) I am too old to "hold on" and you are too young to even exercise that phrase.
Well, I feel better:)
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