children and fools

One of my favorite bible verses has always been, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it." I grew up in Sunday School, taught Sunday School, and now send my children there every week. I believe in that verse and i try to follow that verse. But another proverb that i stumbled upon recently is gaining more weight around my house the older my children get: "children and fools speak the truth."

Tucker is a talker. I mean a drown out the radio, 20 questions, analyzing movies as a toddler kind of talker. Forget the typical first born characteristics--quiet, reserved, organized--he headed straight to the 3rd child qualities, namely "most likely to become a game show host." So to say he tells it like it is is an understatement. Ever since he started watching the Braves, he's been a Brian McCann fan, so much so that he's begging for catcher's gear for Christmas already. Well, last summer, out-of-nowhere, he told me that i had "Brian McCann legs." Hmmm. . . What can you say to that? If he weren't my child i could have come up with plenty of four letter expletives and maybe a face slap. But i think he kind of meant it as a compliment, so I just smiled and said, "Thanks, buddy"

Seething and self-conscious, I headed to the full-length mirror to check it out. No offense, you rich, young Major League catcher, but the last thing a 35 year old pregnant woman wants to hear is that she has the legs of a man who squats for a living. Unfortunately, my job requires me to do squats and lunges in a room surrounded by mirrors, so that Brian McCann "compliment" keeps ringing in my ears. Thanks, Tucker!

Mothers Day rolled around this year and Daddy and the boys decided to buy me a gift certificate to have my hair done. Again, Tucker wasted no time in letting me know that i wasn't quite up to par with how he thought i should look. I envisioned a nice cut, similar to what i usually get, and maybe some highlights resembling my natural color. He had other plans: "Mom, you need to get blonde hair AND you need to start wearing glasses. YOu'd look alot better!" Wow! tell me how you really feel, son.

His honesty and candid remarks aren't just limited to how I look. One night Tucker had obviously met someone from a divorced family and had lots of questions. I tried to explain it as best I could, how kids might live with one parent most of the time, and visit the other parent on weekends. It didn't take him long to decide who he would choose if that were to happen to him: "I'd definitely live with Dad cause he gets tickets to the PeachBowl and Georgia games and mom doesn't." Wow, all those nights rocking a sick baby, nursing ear aches, and changing wet diapers and i'm sold out for sideline passes to an organized brawl in the big city.

One of my favorite times that he "tells it like it is" is when he makes fun of how I run. Running is important to me, and it's something i like to think i do pretty well. To him, though, imitating me as i head up the hill to our house is a riot. "I'm Mom," he shouts, as he tilts his head to the side and dons an intense glare on his face. He's even better when he laughs at me after sneaking a peek at me teaching my Silver Sneakers class. "One, two, one, two," he screams, as he attempts a rather lazy grapevine. hey, what happens with me and my senior citizens behind closed doors is my business!! He thinks i'm a hilarious goofball; and tells me!

He's only nine. I'm not sure how much more of his truth i can stand. But maybe i'm looking at this all wrong. Though he acts like a third child quite a bit, artsy and comedic at the same time, he IS a first born child and they are also known to be pleasers, always trying to make others happy. This is the child who won the Citizenship Award in his class. Maybe what he meant by Brian McCann legs was that I have toned, muscular legs. Isn't that what i work out for? And maybe I WOULD look better with a new hair color. I had lots of compliments when i had my blonde highlights. And seriously, what boy doesn't think his Daddy is the coolest? Maybe i'm the one with the problem, not Tucker. I'm assuming the worst, that all his comments are just a pre-teen waiting to let loose on his parents; when really all he's doing is trying to make us happy.

The more I think about it, the more I like that verse about children speaking the truth. Tell me more, Tucker. The truth sounds pretty good coming from a 9 year old:)